BlackBox Nigeria

LASU SCHOOL FEES INCREMENT! STUDENTS PREPARE FOR SHOWDOWN WITH GOVT, SCHOOL MANAGEMENTT

As a protest towards the lack of will by the government to find a lasting solution to the issue of school fees increment in Lagos State University,LASU, students of the citadel are gathering momentum to stage a massive protest against the Fashola led Government and the school managment led by newly appointed Vice Chancellor, Prof Obafunwa . . . to be concluded

BREAKING NEWS! LASU PRESIDENT,SPEAKER ESCAPES ARREST BY GOVERNMENT

The ongoing crisis in Lagos State University(LASU) as a result of tuition fee increment took a new turn yesterday as the President of the student union,Comrade Akeem Durojaiye and the Speaker of the Student Parliamentary Council,Hon. Rasheed Azeez escaped being arrested by a whisker.
The duo had gone to the Assembly complex in Alausa,Ikeja at the invitation of the Chairman of the commitee set up by the Lagos State House of Assembly to look into the increment saga but on getting there met something else entirely. According to the LASUSU 01,he revealed that ''on getting to the meeting point,We were surprise that nobody was around. Infact calls put to some other commitee members showed us that they were not even aware of the meeting. This made us suspicious of an hanky panky.Later,the Chairman came in and immediately stepped back out with a promise to be back soon.Immediately he left,We also stepped out and to our chagrin,saw a full squad of RRS advancing towards our location.We immediately retreated and took another direction but We were only saved because the security operatives couldnt identify us''.
While corroborating this story,the SPC Speaker, Hon. Azeez disclosed that it was rather unfortunate. ''Before We could make it to Ikeja,we had to engage the services of three different commercial motocyclists(Okada). The first one had a flat tyre while the second had a brake failure.This incidences drew our conciousness and so when We called some other members of the commitee and they declined knowledge of the meeting,We knew something was up'' the Speaker said.
BlacKBox discovered that this incident has infuriated the student populace who before now has decided to sheathe their swords and await the outcome of the commitee meetings. The students had on tuesday .5th of November gone back to their respective halls to write their GNS exams which had earlier been disrupted on two different occasions in protest against the school fees increment.
Although,the government side is yet to make any statement on the incident, it is only hoped that the coming days shall witness a positive conclusion to the crisis.
BlackBox shall keep you updated on developments.

ERAN ILEYA: SURPLUS MEAT FOR THE MALNOURISHED NATION

By Ajasa Olufemi Imagine what a Nigeria would have
been without festive periods like
Salah, Christmas and others? It
will surely have been so
unpleasant. Festive periods are
therefore seriously needed for a
country where carbohydrate is
‘kwashiorkorizing’ majority of the
nation’s citizenry and where the
only good time we have to unwind
and eat healthily is sewed
underneath the work free days
as determined by some iconic
carnivals.
Anytime I see the brightly lit
smiles on the faces of Nigerians
during festive periods, I find it
extremely difficult to hold back
the admiration I have for their
seasonal-inspired joy. Another
one has come, and we all at last
have that little epigrammatic
relief over the so many tensions
creamed on us by our uncaring
leaders. And I kept wondering,
what really is there to smile
about in this country? Believe it,
there are thousand reasons.
Many Nigeria pots will resume
today after long months of
sabbaticals; Many Nigeria teeth
will chew and engage in biscuit-
bone breaking, praising God with
chants created from delicious
rites. Huge proteins will swim into
our systems to aid the energy
produced by the excess starch in
our system and we will be more
prepared to face the impending
subsidy removal by the Goodluck
led administration. Are these not
worth rejoicing? Of course, these
are some key reasons why we
should take a break after long
unfruitful frowns to smile and
hope for a better day.
I boarded a bus on my way to
Iyana-Ipaja recently and had a
very thrilling experience. Did I just
lie? Oh! Sorry, It was a ‘Molue’, one
of the most terrifying means of
road transport the rich class in
Lagos dare not patronize. If you
are conversant with ‘Molues,’ you
will discover that there are so
many innovations advertised by
some articulate vendors to
cushion poverty in Nigeria. I have
seen a marketer selling kerosene
preservative; I have seen other
scruffy and unhealthy looking
ones advertising luck/success
portions and the most common
of all are those that sell medical
drugs.
But there is this one I can never
forget. The one I’m referring to is
one very smart lady with a
sonorous voice who advertised
expertly to the extent that I
clearly hear her voice resounding
in my ears days after. She was
the one that rainbowed my
thought after she had advertised
a blood-building tablet in the
‘Molue’ I boarded on the said
journey to Iyana-Ipaja.
On the journey, she started by
showering active prayers of
diverse dialect codes stolen from
different religions to calm the
nerves of the jumbled audience.
After the prayers, she ordered
the audiences which are now
baptized with her prophetic
words to be attentive to what
she has to say. “Look up and see
my product” she beckoned.
Fortunately, I was sitting at the
rear of the driver, not so far
from her, so I was able to tape
her speech without giraffing.
Choking under the thick heat
emitting from the combustion
engine which is almost
barricading the streets of my
nose, I consoled my self with the
advantage of hearing the vendor
clearly. The hot floor parboiled my
feet and I pitied the lifespan of
the sole of my shoe.
From my vantage point, I turned
my head to see the reaction of
the audience. Turning, I saw the
audiences were as connected to
the vendor as a congregation
would be to a pastor. For a
second time, I noticed those who
had bowed to pay loans of sleep
borrowed from yesterday’ night
are now raising their heads to
reveal their red-fried stressed
eyes.
She wasted no time in getting
into the sermon. “We don’t have
good foods in Nigeria, we don’t
even buy fruits to enrich our
body with needed vitamins, we
are always busy chasing money
and working under tension like a
bakery machine” she complained.
She sighed and furthered: “to
worsen the case, most of us will
eat rice in the morning, Eba in the
afternoon and yam at night. No
protein. No vitamins; do you want
to commit suicide ni? He yelled
sarcastically. With her serious
countenance and sardonic
statements she was able to
wake the first round of laughter
reception from her audience and
this gave her a cue-in to continue
her speech.
“Later, all of you will be
complaining of blood shortage
and start feeling a poking pulse
when you are breathing…and I am
certain most of you here can’t
afford to see a medical doctor.
That is why I brought this
product; it is a blood fortifying
drugs that help to balance your
diet.”
Before I knew it, everybody in the
bus burst into a cooperative
laugh under the spell of the
marketer and started buying the
drugs which to me was most
likely uncertified. Really, I wouldn’t
blame them for their negligence
of this situational error. Why? I
read it in their laughter that
some of them are actually facing
more terrible situations at home
than the pranks made by the
‘jester-pharmacist’. Truly, let us
ask ourselves: what percentage
of Nigerians can out-rightly boast
of eating a balance diet in a day?
In as much as I might not agree
with the statement of the
‘jester-pharmacist’ that we don’t
have nutritious foods in
abundance in Nigeria I still concur
with her about the lack of
vitamins in our daily bread as
there is serious lack of
resources to get the vitamin-rich
meals on our table.
But today, many coated rams
are assembled in various
markets like Wole Soyinka’s hair
to witness the death concert in
satisfying human bliss.
These are seasons that one
should get extra close to ones
muslim friends. Believe me, I have
always found this rewarding. I
won’t forget how a girl walked
straight into my heart years ago,
after I received a gift of big-sized
fried Salah meat wrapped in a
newspaper. To me, that is good
news. If I were some sought of
god at the time, let’s say I was
‘Femi, the gods of taste’ I don’t
think I will hesitate to favor more
of those that thought it good to
keep some pieces of meat to
appease my raging tongue that
salivates to commemorate the
biggest meat festival hosted for
human kind.
What are you thinking? Hope you
are not psycho-analyzing me as a
cheap guy, may be corrupt or
probably a glutton in the making.
If that is what your guess is, then
I totally disagree with your line of
thought. After all, It is normal and
very much accepted to eat high
in celebration of faith than drink
high every evening at bar under
the decoy of “I am watching
premier/champions league.” I
mean, I am still a better person.
I am looking out for that kind-
hearted moslem that will dance
to my altar to give the biggest
chunk this season and I, ‘Femi,
the gods of taste’ will bless the
person if truly I were a god.
My brothers in the north, please I
won’t accept gifts of ‘suyas’
made with bombs. Let us all enjoy
this festival in peace surrounded
by utmost love.
Alaumo Labiaka Lashirika Alahu,
lakaliamdu lashirika laha, ina
lihamdu lashirikala, lakalihamdu
lashirikala.
Welcome to all the Alhaji’s and
Alaja’s, may they return home
safely.
Happy yahamo li Arafat

LASU NEW VC,OBAFUNWA TO RESUME DUTY TODAY.

Amidst crisis and controversies emanating from the recent 800% increment in tuition fee in Lagos State University,the newly appointed Vice Chancellor Prof. John Obafunwa is expected to resume for duties this morning 1st of November,2011.
Prof. Obafunwa resumes at a period when the school is going through major challenges. Asides tuition fee increment,the former Provost of the
Lagos State College of Medicine shall also be confronted with disaccreditation of major courses in LASU by the National Universities Commision (NUC) as well as problems of infrastructural development,inadequate facilities,students and staff unrest etc.
Professor John
Oladapo OBAFUNWA
MBBS, FMCPath, FWACP (Lab.Med), DMJ (Path), FRCPath, FFPath RCP (I), LL.B. (Hons.), FCLM, FICS FFFLM (Lond) is a Proffessor of forensic pathology. He was appointed about a forthnight ago which has been applauded by all stakeholders in the education sector. He is expected to return LASU to its lost glory.
BlackBox. . .be informed!