Saturday, May 7, 2011
funny pictures around lasu!
ETHICAL CODE OF CONDUCTS
BLACKBOX Campus News magazine is based on objectivity and truthful news reportage devoid of victimization, malice or bias.WE believe that a society must check itself with instruments such as the press and that is why WE have decided to take this position in LASU.
WE will not take responsibility for comments and opinions given by members of the UNIVERSITY Community who are not part of BLACKBOX MEDIA.
WE would not celebrate any form of negative activity or hooliganism as regards News coverage.
WE would at all times celebrate all sorts of activities worthy of emulation in order to encourage other students to follow the same path.
WE hold the image of the school in high esteem and it is paramount in all our activities as an organization.
ALL AROUND LASU WITH MADAM SNOOP
Every society needs a domestic police because the rate at which people perpetuate irregularities in quite overwhelming. For the LASU community, I Madam Snoop is the police and I shall bring all culprits to book (thanks to BlackBox). So in all you do, remember Mademoiselle Snoop is watching because there is no hiding place . . . (wicked grin)LASUSU of Jazz
In the last edition, BB pointed out certain names of students contesting for offices in LASUSU which had funny meanings and we warned that Lasuites should take caution or else babalawos would take over the union. Anyway for those who know the number 2 man in the LASUSU secretariat and remembers his name (which has something to do with the head) asides parading himself as the “LASUSU 04” has remained a controversial figure. This dude has been living up to his name as he has been heard several times threatening people (students) with fetish attitudes. His popular term is “I go use jazz knack you”. na wa o.
FMS LASUSU AGENDA
It is a known fact that the faculty of Manslaughter sorry, Faculty of Management Sciences always come out very actively when issues of students unionism rears its ugly head but what is funny is the number of political aspirants who have shown interest for the number 1 slot in the students union. BB gathered that recently a stakeholders meeting was called to discuss the fate of FMS in the next LASUSU elections and about 12 students as in 9,10,11,12 indicated interest for the top job. Amongst them are present Executives, Reps and a young teenager who people have been describing as a joker. Gen gen, e don set!
UNADMIRABLE STUDENT GIVEN MOST ADMIRED STUDENT AWARD
Wonders they say shall never cease and like another saying there is nothing money cannot do. These and many more can be used to describe the last FMS Award ceremony where everything was going on smoothly until it was time to present the award for the most admires jambite and alas came an uncultured and razz Shrek look-alike who could have passed for anything but an admired fellow... So pathetic was the situation that even the MC had to ask this sincere question “are you the one or you wanted to accept it on someone’s behalf”?
300LEVEL LAW STUDENT WHO CAN’T RECITE NATIONAL ANTHEM
If only she had respected herself jeje then katakata won’t have shele. Well it happened that at a recent magazine launch, a rather cute girl was called upon to give the opening prayer after which she decided to assist in running the programme in the absence of the MC. The news anyways is that this girl tried reciting the National Anthem and that was when calamity befell her intellectual beauty. Arise o compatots, Nigeria’s call to pay. To serve our father’s land, with love and love to faith . . . 300level faculty of law Lasu!
EXPOSED: HOSTEL TURNED BROTHEL
For those of us who know this hostel situated around Iyana-Ishashi, well Brown Brothel sorry Hostel is back in the news and this time not for something rosy. News emanating from the hostel which houses both male and female students has it that the place is fast becoming a sex haven. I.e. casual sex has become the order of the day and the funny thing is that so called big girls around LASU are actively involved.
BB reliably gathered that some of the main people on this list are;
A 200l Banking and Finance babe with a dude in 200l Botany
A 200l Marketing babe & a dude in Chemistry Education.
A 200l Insurance babe & a bloke in Banking and finance
Also on the list is a so-called big girl in 300l English and a 200l sociology dude
However, the funny thing is that some the guys involved have decided to spread the gospel and have been inviting their friends to the Brothel sorry, hostel to also have a fair share of the national cake. It was also further investigated some of these people especially the babes have other serious relationships which does not hinder their escapades in anyway.
TWO INDOMIE, ONE EGG
Still on Brown hostel, additional reports coming in have shown that the new found regular meal amongst the gbogbo bigz boiz and bigz galz now is the popular noodles. However, the funny thing is that these students so advertise this 90naira expensive meal that you would think it was sharwama or chicken and chips. For your info, the two indomie, one egg refers to two packs of small size indomie noodles and an egg which invariably costs less than 100 naira. This time I no go mention names, dey sabi demsef.
I CAN’T FIND MY SIZE
This is not the title of a song rather it is the case of a true life story about a LASU girl whose endowment would give Cossy a run for her money. So the news is that a trade fair was organised under the tree and amongst all things being sold was the packaging instrument for girls (is it also called Corset or Bra). So it happened that this girl who is in the Economising department like a lot of other girls went there in company of her friends and why others were happily selecting she was found standing alone at the back which surprised her friends and she was asked if she wasn’t interested but her response was a sober “I can’t find my size.
AFTERNOON LAW DINNER
The recent law elections were preceded by a manifesto and we were all there to observe but what really grabbed our attention was the speech by eventual winner, em em pastor you now. So the issue is that of law dinner and as we all know the annual dinner is a heritage highly cherished by law, it was a deep topic of discourse during the debate especially as it concerns the insecurity witnessed in recent past. What is however the bone of contention is the statement by the eventual winner who disclosed that if voted in, he would ensure the law dinner holds during a ‘Godly hour’ of 2pm in the afternoon and 7pm in the evening. What manner of law dinner? Shouldn’t we rather say LAW LUNCH would be a better name, abi what the meaning of law dinner in the afternoon?
1 SHOE AND 1 SATIN LACE
A story has been told of this powerful legal student whose fashion sense would cause ripples in your spines. She is reported to be a former No2 citizen of the prestigious white and black college who got elevated to the top due to an academically related call her boss had to obey. Rumour has it that there is this particular shoe our madam is so fond of to the extent that you would see it on her immediately after reading this piece. For those who lack observatory skills, yes it was the same shoe she wore to the Law dinner, Classfon dinner and every other programme she has found herself in recent times. She is also rumoured to be fond of satin lace as her official white top on black skirt. Well, I can’t confirm this but I can recall that she wore a satin lace to the law dinner and the Classfon dinner although the colours were different. When next you see her, please give our emeritus 01 her deserved accolades oh and please, do not dare light a match beside her. Court dismissed!
THE WHIP AND THE CONTAINER
‘Wonders upon the earth hath endowed’ did that statement make sense to you, no? Neither did it make sense to me. So is this next story you are about to hear.
Now, it is the story of the legislative mace bearer who seems to be biting more than he can chew in his choice of relationship.
We gather that the container or you can call her madam in question is a student in Sciences and their combination is like that of ‘Ofiliganga and Shanko Rashidi’. Well for those who can decode, this is for you.
JOKES
5,000 Naira VOTE
The Lasusu election might have come and gone but some memories cannot be forgotten as they will keep lingering in our minds for a long time to come. Such cases definitely shouldn’t be swept under the carpet. It was reported that one of the presidential candidates in his quest to emerge winner went to a faculty and allegedly settled some stakeholders (or is it stalk-holders) in other to get the support of majority of the students though their votes. In all, BB was reliably informed that this candidate gave out a cash sum of 10,000 naira and he was importantly rewarded with a total of 2 (as in TWO) votes. Funny isn’t it? 5k per vote.
BLACKBERRY MADNESS
Saying this advance GSM has taken over LASU is obviously an over-statement. However what make up this piece is the extent students especially girls would go to acquire this gadget. All around campus, shawties are now seen keeping to themselves and laughing widely because of adverse pinging. In fact you can’t relate with some girls now except you have pinging effects. There are some girls who don’t even give out phone numbers any more but would simply say ‘you can have my BB Pin’. Madam Snoop reliably gathered that some girls who simply can’t afford BB have extended their hustling techniques and now trade day and night, body and soul to acquire a BB. In fact boys are not left out; a certain student of the Historical Department who resides in the Presidential Cabin 202 has been rewarded for a service well given by an appreciative customer who was thrilled by his ability to perform like a dipsomaniac. Another annoying thing is the nuisance charging of these BB in class even while lectures are going on. And the new mode of greeting has been introduced to accommodate the BB, while trying to say HI to their fellow student , their coffin bag on the ankle joint and the BB on the palm would be waving at you, if they are trying to show it off i dont know but what madness INDEED. I just bought my own BB but I would be purchasing the pin sometimes next week so don’t ask me . . . . . . . .
NB: information coming in has it that LASU is about to be flooded with new influx of assorted BBs due to the bursary finance which is about to be paid. Madam Snoop is watching
THE LASU STORY WITH KAYODE BADMUS
OVERZEALOUS POLITICAL AMBITIONS NOT THE WAYFORWARDWhen PDP declared that they as a political party (whether with or without positive ideology) would rule Nigeria for the next 50years, the supposed Nigerian progressives (whosoever they are) took
them to the cleaners criticizing that declaration but seriously as indications suggest, Nigeria seems to be moving towards that direction.
It is quite pathetic that even though Nigeria is yet to swear-in a new President after the just concluded elections, political jobbers are already propagating towards future elections. I was shocked to get wind of an Eastern caucus who have been meeting regularly to ensure that the 2015 Presidency is zoned to the south-east (i.e produce the first Ibo President). To me, this is insincerity of purpose. What they are simply telling us is that they are less concerned about Nigeria and what happens to it or how it would be run for the next 4years. If only they understood the National Anthem they recite, perhaps their resolve would have acted differently. The issue of political zealousness has gone deep into the Nigerian polity and our own dear Lagos State University is not left out.
Barely a month after the new Executives-In-Council of the Lagos State University Student’s Union (LASUSU) were sworn in and several weeks before the commencement of the 10/11 academic session, I was rather shocked to gather that quite a lot of students have started showing interest in the yet to fully occupied post (because the elected Excos were yet to begin work fully due to the just concluded examinations then). It would rather shock you to note that from Faculty of Management Science alone over a dozen aspirants are aspiring for the post of President while some others have been showing interest in other Executive positions too.
Although this development is becoming a norm going by the introspection of the LASU polity, it is quite unfair to the students (electorates) who are yet to get value for the process they only went through recently. More annoying is the fact that some of these early aspirants are newly elected Executives or (dis)honourables in their respective Departments and Faculties and are yet to get anything done in these positions. It should be noted that only selfish reasons would make people start declaring this early because I believe a manifesto asides stating your intentions should also include your improvement of what is presently obtainable (I.e. building on the weakness of the present administration and in this case they are yet to begin work).
I must have been thinking aloud when I said I might give the LASUSU Presidency a shot in the next election and before I knew what was going on, it had spread like wide fire to the extent of causing emotional and political crisis in some political camps. You would be surprised that more than 5 aspirants already came to me to say they were ready to step down to other positions as long as I was ready to support them. Just like that, even without listening to my manifesto or agenda. Well I might have exaggerated the numbers but the truth is these people know themselves.
Though I am a Political Science student coupled with all my political inclination, I still find it rather odd that these people are already losing sleep over a position which is yet to be declared vacant. An aspirant even gave the lame excuse of “it is better to inform people earlier so that by the time others come, they would remember you told them first”. To this I ‘laugh out loud’. Oluwatosin Gbadamosi who contested in the last election only came out a few weeks to the initial date of October 14th but ended up as runner up and even overcoming those who have been signifying interest since 100level. You would also remember a candidate who contested in the election which brought in Leke Bakare and emerged last. This candidate went about immediately after the election to inform people to please have him in mind as he still intend coming back next year to contest for the same position. Well, we all know the outcome which is not an interesting piece, again he emerged last! What we fail to realise is that Lasuites are not market women or artisans that would be held on a tight rope due to the excuse of early information. What they want from you when the time comes is a proper and articulate documentation of your plans which is known as a manifesto and what you were able to achieve in all your years on campus most especially in the presiding year. Perhaps, some people would tell the electorates they spent the year campaigning early.
The sincere truth is this; in LASU, the doctrine of the earlier the better is less applicable. Everybody’s hand should be on deck to achieve a greater success for the present administration. Paraphrasing the thought of Late Kwame Nkrumah of Ghana, “seek ye first the success of this present administration and every other things shall follow”. Shikena.
BE POSITIVE!
THE PARLIAMENT!
LASUSU SPC REMOVES TRANSPORT SECRETARYThese are not the best of times for the Lagos State University Student Parliamentary Council (LASUSU-SPC) as the recently appointed secretary of the transport committee was on Friday 8th April 2011 removed in a case of financial misconduct and mal appropriation.
It was revealed exclusively to BlackBox that the secretary who is the immediate past Speaker of the Faculty of Science Students Representatives Council, Mukaila Wasiu declared the sum of 30,000 for a trip outside the country which ought to have amounted to 150,000. He was also accused of deceiving other members of the transport committee that the bus was going to Badagry while in actual fact it travelled to Benin Republic and Ile Ife in Osun state.
It was alleged that honourable Mukaila received more than he declared and this infuriated the majority of the house who demanded for his immediate removal as secretary.
In a heated debate which lasted for several hours and which also had the Lasusu President, Lai Adebayo and some cabinet members (also respondents) in attendance, honourables on the floor of the hallowed chambers agreed that the SPC would only be justified in its obligation to check the excesses of the Executive in Council if only the house is sanitized of matters relating to graft.
The house in making its decision agreed that Hon. Mukaila Wasiu be removed as secretary of transport committee and also suspended indefinitely on the floor of the house until he pays up the differences of the money he declared.
Further investigations by BlackBox revealed that the trip which the bus was used fo was a field trip involving students of zoology department where Mukaila is a final year student and that 70 students attended the 7days trip with each student paying 10,000 each. This means, a sum of 700,000 thousand was gotten for the trip which took them for Benin Republic and Osun state.
BITS FROM THE HOUSE
HONORABLES GET CALL ALLOWANCE: This parliament really seems to be ready to go places with new innovative being introduced into the legislative settings. The first was the inaugural sitting which was set at properly integrating the honourables to legislative duties, then the provision of the Lasusu constitution to all Faculties. Now the speaker is at it again as penultimate week saw honourables being given a substantial sum of money for recharge cards to make phone calls. It is indeed another step towards the right direction and we hope this continues to ensure honourables also get dividends of the ‘ALUTA CAKE’
POINT OF ORDERS: A new visitor to the Lasusu SPC would be shocked with the level of unruliness which sometimes plagues the house. Infact, one major issue that has aided this is the way honourables cite the POINT OF ORDERS on one another. If an honourable dare make a mistake either in following protocols or in addressing the house, the shout of ORDER! would almost deafen your ears. The pathetic thing is that some (un)Honourables don’t even know why orders are cited yet they shout order given any opportunity. Honourable speaker, deputy speaker, honourable cle*** ORDER! Order of what? I no know
PATRICK OBAYAGBON IN SPC: Anyone who has followed the Nigerian national assembly in recent times would obviously know the gentleman who represents one of the Federal constituencies in Edo state, Hon. Patrick Obayagbon. Now what’s peculiar about this man is a not just his funny fashion sense but what comes out of his mouth, as in his grammatical vocabulary is highly pronounced to the extent when he now uses Latin as a dilution to English.
Already, to many he is becoming a sought of legend and it is not surprising to find youths trying to emulate him by using ambiguous and gigantic grammars which cannot be easily downloaded by the receiver. One these apostles is Hon. Masari from Education Constituency in the Lasusu SPC who have mastered the mode of mimicking the Edo Barrister to a level where his calling upon in the Lasusu SPC leads to other honourables listening in rapt attention and some others in total disgust.
INFORMATION: Information is powerful, COMMUNICATION is defined as a simple passing of message to a receiver and any unclear or ambiguous grammar is referred to as NOISE in communication. Hon. Masari! Stop making noise.
MUCH ADO ABOUT SPC COMMITTEES: it is alarming the rate at which committees are set up in the house. Infact, every issue has a committee but the annoying thing is that non of these committees are functioning except the transport and taskforce standing committees. With due respect to the supreme Lasusu constitution, the standing committees are quite essential but the level at which the house establishes ad-hoc and sub committees is an issue worth discussing. The committee set up to look into the issue SJC is yet to begin work, Honourables committee, pure water committee etc. The house even has a committee for refreshment. lol
ILLEGAL HONOURABLEs: it has been alleged that the Lasusu SPC is occupied by all sought of people, both those who are qualified and those who aren’t. It was even revealed that some of the honourables have questionable G.Ps which do not meet up to the required points. Already as you might want to guess, the speaker has set up a committee to look into it.
MR. SPEAKER, AM I MAD
During his campaign, he was known to have used ambiguous vocabularies which are synonymous to his size. Well, I wouldn’t bore you with rhetoric but we all remember the Bros who told us “ your absolute welfarism is my uttermost concern”. Okay now that the elections are over, the legislative arm was unexpectant of what hit it the other day when some executive members were summoned. So it was asked why the Lasusu officer was acting pompous or perhaps he thought his office was bigger than the house. To this he had this to say, “my powerful honourable speaker, my very eloquent deputy speaker, my efficient clerk and my gigantic honourables, I can never, I will never and I shall never say that a W******E director is bigger than an honourable. AM I MAD . . . ? Perhaps
TOP 10 LASU ENTERTAINERS!
1. Damilola Damoche: These days, no party is complete without people dancing to his hit single ‘ob* to che’. Although, some of the lyrics are lewd and explicit, Damoche has become a household name in the music industry especially in Africa’s entertainment capital Lagos. However, Damino Damoche being a Lasuite might come to many as a surprise but wait until I tell you his academic stand. As at last count, Damoche’s unofficial calculated G.P. stood at a fantastic 4.2 which means he is a scholar and to many that is highly surprising. Damoche (real name olaniyan damilola ibrahim) graces the BlackBox top spot because amongst artiste who are students of Lasu, Damoche stands out as a force to be reckoned with presently not just in Lasu but in the entertainment industry generally especially considering the short period he has used therein.2. XCLASS: Mr ‘most wanted’ as he is also called is a 400level student of philosophy in the faculty of art. He is one of the most known entertainers in Lasu but he proved to all and sundary that he is more than a local champion with his super collabo with Ginger General himself, Terry G on his infamous Most Wanted track. His video for the same song is also still enjoying massive airplay on terrestrial and cable TV but Xclass reveals that he has not yet arrived. He is currently working on another collaboration with Egberi Papa 1 of Bayelsa, Timaya and hopes to finally release an album before the year runs out. Xclass (short for executive class) has rocked different stages in and outside Lasu. His remix of late Dagrin’s Pon Pon Pon is a fans favourite anytime.
3. Mc Vans: Edwin Mcvans is little known to Lasuites especially those outside the science faculty but his creativity and originality cannot be overemphasised. With production credits to songs by a-list artistes like Tuface Idibia, Sound Sultan, Durela at al, Mcvans has finally nailed his name in the threshold of Nigerian entertainment history as a force to be reckoned with. As an artiste, he can also not be said to be doing badly as he now perform at gigs and shows where the acceptance from fans is nothing short of excellent.
4. LALA: we all remember dancing to his song, “baby girl, the thing wey I like for you body na your *****”. Lala is more or less is the most loved Lasu artiste in the campus environment. Asides having a signature sing along tune in the monster hit single featuring late Dagrin, Lala has proven to be the most consistent artiste in Lasu performing at almost every gig on campus. A couple of years ago, Lala’s ‘Idinla’ toped all major charts in the country and the dude lived up to the billing with his smooth performances, enchanting dance moves and superb voice which many likened to the Mo Hits wonder kid Wande Coal. He is presently working on a video shoot which is planned at further connecting him with his numerous fans nationwide.
5. SM Salaye: His consistency on stage has made him an household name in Lasu especially at the school of communication where he is presently a final year student. Shalaye started performing on stage in 100level and till date is still a darling to a lot of students most of whom are students of Mass Comm. SM lives in a world of reality and hopes to make it big by churning out hit after hit after living school which obviously is very soon considering the Lasu academic calendar.
6. Fresh Boiz: There in the faculty of arts, in the wonderful world of theatrical practice lives a musical group of wonder kids birthed with the ideology of entertaining people and making a difference in the process. Welcome to the world of Fresh Boiz. Inspiring and skilful, this group is a 5man team consisting of ********. What they do is to entertain which means asides singing they also engage in some acting which is actually their first love when considering their choice of study course. Infact, for some time now no show has held in the school auditorium without Fresh Boiz on the bill. Yes boss.
GIRLS HOSTEL: OVER CONGESTION, OVERPOPULATION, LACK OF TRANSPORTATION
The girls hostel has now turned into a barracks of some sought as the issue of congestion has become unbearable for occupants who have been overheard lament about the situation.BlackBox gathered that a room which before now accommodates 4 students has been increased to as much as 8 students while the one which hitherto accommodated 6 girls now houses not less than 10 people with each student paying the required 50,000 naira per session.
This issue has become so pathetic to the extent that the reading room has been converted into a room. It was however discovered that the admission of new students have actually increased the request for accommodation and this has made the authorities of the hostel increase the number of students occupying the hostel by almost 100% without creating more facilities.
In an interview with an occupant of the hostel Miss Adijat Ajenifuja, she disclosed that the hostel is now clumsy and really overpopulated. She also said that another problem was the restriction order on visitors to the hostel. She revealed that they are not allowed to receive visitors which are quite unfair. In reacting to this development, the LASUSU Welfare Director, Comrade Olayode Adesoji lamented the state at which things were going in the hostel. He said it was quite sad that the girls were paying more and getting less in terms of services. On measures being taken by the union, he disclosed that the Union shall try everything within its capacity to ensure that this issue is seriously tackled and that they were going to meet with the necessary quarters to ensure that a solution is arrived at.
The girls also complained that asides the insensitive attitude of the school management, they also have an axe to grind with the Students Union who has failed to provide transportation as they promised during their campaigns. The girls stated it categorically that the President, Lai Adebayo promised them that if voted in , he would ensure that a permanent solution is provided to the transportation menace being faced by the girls.
In a swift reaction, Lai Adebayo has refuted claims that he has not done anything to solve the transport issue. He said that over the past days, he has visited the hostel severally to find a way of solving the problem. He further revealed that he has specifically instructed the Welfare Director to take charge and ensure a lasting solution is provided. To this the welfare director revealed that they have began work and would be meeting transport operators within the school to generally find a lasting solution to the tiring journey embarked upon by the girls on daily basis.
In addition, the Speaker, of the LASUSU Student Parliamentary Council, Rt Hon. Ganiu Ibikunle has reiterated that the hallowed chambers was going to set up a committee to look into the issue and give necessary recommendations to the school to avoid any form of confrontation whatsoever.
The female hostel was opened for students’ accommodation during the 2007/2008 academic session to bring to the barest minimum the accommodation problem being faced by majority of Lasuites. BB
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